Stress is sneaky. It tightens your shoulders and tries to hitch them to your ear lobes. It sends blood racing to the center of your body, upsetting your tummy and leaving your hands and feet cold. Your muscles clench, temples throb, and chocolate becomes your only food group. All while giving you the illusion that you’re
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By Joan Jackson When a loved one slides into dementia, the progression is not straight line. What they were able to do last month, last week, or even yesterday may suddenly no longer be possible. We often hear caregivers describe the frustration of trying to get a parent or spouse with dementia to follow through
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Here’s a definition of retirement that may not be what most of us envision when we contemplate the blessed moment when we turn in our employee ID badges: Bowing out of the workforce means having the time to take care of your aging parents. This is not my situation, but it is, thank goodness, my
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Always live up to your standards – by lowering them, if necessary. ~ Mignon McLaughlin, The Second Neurotic’s Notebook When “Bad Girls” fold towels, the corners don’t line up and they’ve learned not to worry about it. In fact, their towels probably remain tangled and wrinkling in the clothes dryer until dire necessity calls them
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Does your aging mom complain that her raspberries don’t taste right anymore? Is your husband pouring so much salt in his soup that you’re seriously worried about his hypertension? Do you notice yourself adding extra sugar to your chai latte? Most of us know that we’ll get a few “laugh lines” as we age, and
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I have a precious friend, now in her late 80s, who is tough, bright and energetic (she still takes tap-dance lessons). She has survived a massive stroke and the loss of her husband and many of her friends, and through it all I’ve never heard her complain. But several years ago, elbows on the table
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“What happened to me?” While some of the losses and demands of caregiving are large and immediate, many of the changes are more subtle, chipping away at your life one small piece at a time. Hobbies are set aside for the ever-increasing time it takes to care for your loved one. Exercise is traded for
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Caregiving is physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually draining. The loved one you care for can be agitated and angry one moment, confused and helpless the next, and loving and appreciative a few moments later. Your work is often 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. The National Alliance of Caregivers in a 2006 study
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You’re a family caregiver and your loved one is yelling at you. At the end of a long day, it’s tough not to feel hurt or yell back. Dementia, Alzheimer’s disease and other illnesses that interfere with normal brain function can trigger anger, abuse or delusions in the person you’re caring for. While medications may
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